Monty Python: Bicycle repairman!

HEY! It's Nordic Ski Season

The bicycle is SO important to our society, that it's sometimes easy to forget that Revolution Cycle and SKI has another business in the winter. That's right friends and neighbors, we're a Nordic Ski shop as well. This has started off as the best skiing winter in a very long time, so I'll be back to write more as the days go by. In the meantime though, here is a video that demonstrates the fun of citizen Cross Country ski racing:

Neglect

SORRY, I've been negligent to the hords of eager readers of this blog.
As an apology, I offer the following from UTube. It's a pretty funny Monty Python skit called, "The Bicycle Repairman"

Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eCdIe0wdvU

Efficient?

Have I mentioned that the bicycle is the most efficient means of locomotion there is? This was told to me by a person who seemed to me, at the time, to be pretty credible - a scientific nerdy type who spoke with authority on esoterica. Anyhow, according to this person, a bicycle is more efficient than a Canada Goose. Now, the Canada Goose, like its cousin, the Grey Goose (not the vodka), flies for several thousand miles on its migration. By definition then, it has to be pretty efficient. But, one revolution of a bicycle crank - you pick the gear - propels the rider further than one flap of the goose's wings. Not only that, it takes less energy to turn the cranks than it does to flap the wings. Ergo, the bicycle is a more efficient means of locomotion. This is not to say that a rider is in better shape than a goose. Nor does it imply that a typical rider tastes better than a well cooked goose. It does however, pose some interesting questions related to the whole area of hunting. Now, shooting a goose while it's migrating is a pretty good trick on accounta their speed as fliers. Not only that, but the typical hunter looks like one, has a dog and carries a pretty big gun that tends to make quite a bit of noise. On the other hand, hunters that prefer cyclists tend to be much harder to spot. For one thing, they usually do not float around in a camouflage boat with a horn between their lips. Another thing seems to be that most tend towards blindness making it difficult to make eye contact. Another thing is that the weapon of choice is the automobile. (I'll apologize before I say what follows and I'll also apologize to the woman who almost got me this morning because I really didn't mean to call her a fucking douche bag and to insult her intelligence the way that I did. I must admit to a certain degree of sincerity at the time because it's hard to scream at the top of your voice and still be ignored but what the heck, we all act in haste some times, don't we? She's probably a wonderfully nice caring person but I can't understand why she is allowed to drive as a blind person. Hey, speaking of hunting dogs, do you suppose that you could train a dog to be a seeing eye driving dog? Arf means go left arf arf means go right arf arf arf means stop or variations on the theme depending on your own preferences, dog & etc. But I digress ...) We were discussing the weapon of choice (no, not the Fat Boy Slim song), the automobile - catchy name, no? auto as in automatic and mobile as in having mobility auto mobile automobile ... pretty damn good these cunning linguists. Ya know, it's hard to write something that actually has a beginning, a middle and an end. Like now, I can't come up with an end. So, I'll sign off with a wish - I wish that the automobile had never been invented. I wish that we all lived in cities and all rode bikes and were all civilized to each other and all carried spare tubes that we happily shared with people who got two flats on that day and that we were all as efficient at thinking as the bicycle is at locomotion.
See ya.

You Simply Can't Make This Stuff Up

Who says that you can't learn anything doing crossword puzzles?
Next time you're out there on your bike, in search of a miracle, keep this handy reference in mind:
The Patron Saint of Cyclists is, The Madonna del Ghisallo
Also known as
Our Lady of Ghisallo; Madonna of Ghisallo
Profile
Medieval legend says that Count Ghisallo was travelling near the village of Magréglio when he was attacked by highway bandits. Spotting a image of the Virgin Mary in a roadside shrine, he broke away from his attackers and ran to it. There he took refuge, pled for Our Lady's protection - and was miraculously saved from the robbers.

As the story spread, the Madonna del Ghisallo became known as patroness of local travellers. In more recent times, cyclists would often stop to rest and pray at the chapel, which is a local landmark, and is at the top of a steep hill. After World War II, Father Ermelindo Vigano, pastor at the shrine, proposed Ghisallo as the site of an Italian shrine for bicyclists, and she was given as patroness of cyclists on 13 October 1949 by Pope Pius XII. The chapel has become equal part religious shrine, part cycling museum, with artifacts and photos from the sport. There is an eternal flame that burns there in memory of the cyclists of are no longer with us, and services each Christmas Eve and the Feast of All Souls commemorate them.

And all this time, I thought it was a helmet or an excuse for a pub crawl (tub ride). Say, can I get in trouble for posting something that some cynics may think irreverent?
Oh well ...

It's Hard To Spin Positively

I Just had to place the ly on Positive above ... sorry.

Here's the reason for the negativity: some neanderthal, with his posse, tried to steal the nicest BMX bike we had in the store today. Fortunately for us, he never dreamed that Mike would catch him so easily. As we experience more negative stuff at the shop, it seems to solicit more negative stories related to people stealing, or attempting to steal bikes. So, why is that? Why is it that scum bags like the person in our store today, feel that they have a right to take somebodies bike?

Here is my true life story - I got my first real job at a bank in Boston. I had just gotten married and was still in school, so we were extremely conscious of spending on wasteful things, like cars. Anyhow, I bought a cheap 10-speed and commuted to work each day. I chained the bike to a pole. Within two weeks, it was gone. Ever the optimist, I went back and got another, at a cost of roughly one weeks net pay. The new bike lasted about three weeks, because the (not so sympathetic) Boston police advised me to leave it parked at a different spot each day. Anyhow, I bought a third ... it was gone in about two weeks and I was back on the subway.

I'd be willing to bet that, at the very least, we all know of or have had a bike stolen. We hear it almost every day. If it's not the whole bike, it's the saddle or a wheel or whichever part can be taken.

I doubt that the thieves are going to read this blog, but if you are, cut that shit out!

Bettcha He Drives a Hummer

Ben sent me a link that I am compelled to share:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ip8nozp7vs8
This is Patrick McHenry the US Congressional Representative from the 10th district in North Carolina.
This all seems a bit silly but, exerpted below is the paragraph from the Renewable Energy Act of 2007 that got rep. McHenry in a snit:
SEC. 205. EXTENSION OF TRANSPORTATION FRINGE BENEFIT TO
BICYCLE COMMUTERS.

(a) In General.--Paragraph (1) of section 132(f) of the Internal Revenue Code of 1986 (relating to general rule for qualified transportation fringe) is amended by adding at the end the following:

``(D) Any qualified bicycle commuting reimbursement.''.
(b) Limitation on Exclusion.--Paragraph (2) of section 32(f) of such Code is amended by striking ``and'' at the end of subparagraph (A), by striking the period at the end of subparagraph (B) and inserting ``, and'', and by adding at the end the following new subparagraph:
``(C) the applicable annual limitation in the case of any qualified bicycle commuting reimbursement.''.
(c) Definitions.--Paragraph (5) of section 132(f) of such Code (relating to definitions) is amended by adding at the end the following:
``(F) Definitions related to bicycle commuting
reimbursement.--
``(i) Qualified bicycle commuting reimbursement.--The term ‘qualified bicycle commuting reimbursement' means, with respect to any calendar year, any employer reimbursement during the 15-month period beginning with the first day of such calendar year for reasonable expenses incurred by the employee during such calendar year for the purchase of a bicycle and bicycle improvements, repair, and storage, if such bicycle is regularly used for travel between the employee's residence and place of employment.
``(ii) Applicable annual limitation.--The term `applicable annual limitation' means, with respect to any employee for any calendar year, the product of $20 multiplied by the number of qualified bicycle commuting months during such year.
``(iii) Qualified bicycle commuting month.--The term
`qualified bicycle commuting month' means, with respect to any employee, any month during which such employee-- ``(I) regularly uses the bicycle for a substantial portion of the travel between the employee's residence and place of employment, and
``(II) does not receive any benefit described in
subparagraph (A), (B), or (C) of paragraph (1).''.

(d) Constructive Receipt of Benefit.--Paragraph (4) of section 132(f) is amended by inserting ``(other than a qualified bicycle commuting reimbursement)'' after
``qualified transportation fringe''.
(e) Effective Date.--The amendments made by this section shall apply to taxable years beginning after December 31, 2007.
Now, you've all heard the term, "lawyer-speak", this is a fine example. It seems to me that perhaps, a better use of congressional time may be to suggest language more like, "hey, take out zero and insert $20.00 under the part about employer re-imbursement for riding your bike to work."
I would also be remiss if I did not add, that we all should be contacting our congressional representatives, from both houses, to be sure that they support any benefit that may accrue from riding a bike.
Thanks for tuning in - get out and ride!

Revolution Racks Race Recognition!!

This past weekend at the Ore to Shore Race, rad Revolution riders racked up race recognition with results. Returning home riders raved about rocks rising higher than rainbows. Referees registered results with great reception of St. Cloud Revolution riders. Results read over the radio rattled competitors radiant smiles and rammed them into the red rasberry patches of the race course. " Mike Schroden 2nd (in class), Kyia Malenkovich (2nd overall), Kate Foley (3rd in class), Sheila Amo (2nd in class). Riders revealed rags helpful as rain receded in record levels. Rashes raped robust riders. But regardless of their recrudescent skin riders' radars stayed rich with visions of rewarding raffles and ran the course ridculously rapid. Ramping up to collect ransom, riders returned home for ranch dressing and raisins.

Congrats all Revolution Riders at Ore to Shore !!!!


Oh yea! Also to mention is Josh Gold's 28th overall and 5th in the bike finish at the Northwoods Triathlon and our remorse to Andy Schlicht who crashed 200m from the finish at the Birchwood Road Race. Road Rash will heal, his snapped fork won't but Andy, I know some good fella's in a store in St. Cloud who will be more that happy to help out.

Remember to Ride Revolutioneers!
Regards

Revolution Rejects Rumor

It has yet to issue an official statement, but an un-named source at awesome bike shop, Revolution Cycle and Ski, has denied rumors that it has purchased the Discovery Pro Cycling Team. The source said something along the lines of, who needs em? and hung up the phone.

More as things develop.

Revolving Around - Thoughts on Cycling

The Revolution Cycle and Ski site isn't set up so that we can have visitors respond to either the site, or what you have seen in the store or anything else. So, we thought that we'd set up a blog where we can wax on about the joys of riding a bike. You can write back and tell us that we're full of prunes or write about your own cycling experiences, favorite rides or anything else you care to comment on.
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