Efficient?

Have I mentioned that the bicycle is the most efficient means of locomotion there is? This was told to me by a person who seemed to me, at the time, to be pretty credible - a scientific nerdy type who spoke with authority on esoterica. Anyhow, according to this person, a bicycle is more efficient than a Canada Goose. Now, the Canada Goose, like its cousin, the Grey Goose (not the vodka), flies for several thousand miles on its migration. By definition then, it has to be pretty efficient. But, one revolution of a bicycle crank - you pick the gear - propels the rider further than one flap of the goose's wings. Not only that, it takes less energy to turn the cranks than it does to flap the wings. Ergo, the bicycle is a more efficient means of locomotion. This is not to say that a rider is in better shape than a goose. Nor does it imply that a typical rider tastes better than a well cooked goose. It does however, pose some interesting questions related to the whole area of hunting. Now, shooting a goose while it's migrating is a pretty good trick on accounta their speed as fliers. Not only that, but the typical hunter looks like one, has a dog and carries a pretty big gun that tends to make quite a bit of noise. On the other hand, hunters that prefer cyclists tend to be much harder to spot. For one thing, they usually do not float around in a camouflage boat with a horn between their lips. Another thing seems to be that most tend towards blindness making it difficult to make eye contact. Another thing is that the weapon of choice is the automobile. (I'll apologize before I say what follows and I'll also apologize to the woman who almost got me this morning because I really didn't mean to call her a fucking douche bag and to insult her intelligence the way that I did. I must admit to a certain degree of sincerity at the time because it's hard to scream at the top of your voice and still be ignored but what the heck, we all act in haste some times, don't we? She's probably a wonderfully nice caring person but I can't understand why she is allowed to drive as a blind person. Hey, speaking of hunting dogs, do you suppose that you could train a dog to be a seeing eye driving dog? Arf means go left arf arf means go right arf arf arf means stop or variations on the theme depending on your own preferences, dog & etc. But I digress ...) We were discussing the weapon of choice (no, not the Fat Boy Slim song), the automobile - catchy name, no? auto as in automatic and mobile as in having mobility auto mobile automobile ... pretty damn good these cunning linguists. Ya know, it's hard to write something that actually has a beginning, a middle and an end. Like now, I can't come up with an end. So, I'll sign off with a wish - I wish that the automobile had never been invented. I wish that we all lived in cities and all rode bikes and were all civilized to each other and all carried spare tubes that we happily shared with people who got two flats on that day and that we were all as efficient at thinking as the bicycle is at locomotion.
See ya.